So lately, the black dog has been back. Thanks, Winston Churchill, for the phrase.

And thanks Elizabeth Wurtzel for the following quotes.

That’s the thing about depression: A human being can survive almost anything, as long as she sees the end in sight. But depression is so insidious, and it compounds daily, that it’s impossible to ever see the end. The fog is like a cage without a key.

I start to think there really is no cure for depression, that happiness is an ongoing battle, and I wonder if it isn’t one I’ll have to fight for as long as I live. I wonder if it’s worth it.

I start to feel like I can’t maintain the facade any longer, that I may just start to show through. And I wish I knew what was wrong. Maybe something about how stupid my whole life is.

I get a quote through text on my phone every day. Sometimes they’re stupid, sometimes I like them. Here are 2 I got this week that I enjoyed:

“The men who try to do something and fail are infinitely better than those who try to do nothing and succeed.” – Lloyd Jones

“The world needs anger. The world often continues to allow evil because it isn’t angry enough.” – Bede Jarrett

Lately I’ve been thinking about attitudes, positive vs. negative ones. This may come as no shock, but I’ve found that a positive attitude brings me through the day happier than a negative one, by far. So I’ve been trying and mostly succeeding in keeping a good attitude, and thus, keeping myself happier throughout the day.

“I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances.” – Martha Washington

She says it in a much more succinct way.

I’m tired. Work makes me tired . Oh well. I cut most of my hair off today. It’s fantastic. Light and bouncy and easy to tame. It will also fit under a hard hat. +1 to less hair.

Dale is takin’ me to dinner tomorrow. Yay boyfriends who pay for shit!

That is all for today.

In silence, I like to think out loud
You say this is the end
I know it’s not the end
I took a picture
Of heaven when we broke down
Across the shining light
I never will forget
The color of last night
Over us

We missed the point in living
So caught up in this moment
We threw out all convictions
And traded them for substance
This life you hold so near
Will fade in time…

And so it goes
No we won’t let go
If you are alive
Then be truly alive
Just open up your eyes
Pay attention to the signs
The color of the sky in this night

We missed the point in living
So caught up in this moment
We threw out all convictions
And traded them for substance
This life we hold so dear
Will fade in…
Time spend wasted on a lie
It’s time you found some frame of mind
This life you hold so near
Will fade in time

We missed the point in living
So caught up in this moment
We threw out all convictions
And traded them for substance
This life we hold so dear
Will fade in time

And so it goes
No we won’t let go
And so it goes
No no you won’t let go
This life you hold so dear
Will fade in time…

We ate Moe’s, nom nom nom. Then we went to Petco…I have decided that I want a tortoise and a bearded dragon!

Anyways! Iron Man. Decent…not the best movie ever, but by no means the worst. Entertaining…I want a big iron suit and to shoot balls of light at people and stuff.

And that is my review.

We might be supposed to raid tonight, I dunno, I’ma clean my room, and wash all the clothes I’m not getting rid off….maybe I should sell some books on Amazon. I think I will. And tomorrow after work, I’m gonna get my hair cut, woot!

I should be showering, and I will in a minute. I’m glad I got to talk to Yaara for a while…and now I can call her at ungodly hours, bwahahaha. What else, what else…I got nothin’, really. I start work again on Monday, which is good cause money is good, so on and so forth. More to come, gonna try to keep this updated…